New Math and Avian head shops...

- posted by Bill

“8 + 7 does not equal 17 Bill”. Okay, to be fair I can add, but somehow I’d gotten into my head that a regulation game was 16 players and when I start adding or subtracting from that point I actually got the math right but my baseline data was flawed. Which is a ridiculous excuse but actually what was going on in my head yesterday afternoon as we were coming back into the locker room after a great game of 8 on 7.

As we wandered out yesterday, I noticed the grass had not been cut and that there were a gaggle of Canadian Geese just sitting on our field. They quickly took flight noticing the approaching Buzzards but they left us “presents” all over the field. Is it just me or does goose feces have a disturbingly similar aroma to cannabis? Had they detoured over Northern California? You know, as professional Law Enforcement officers, we weren’t too sure what our jurisdiction over the geese were or if we had extradition agreements with Canada so we decided not to pursue that action and instead just pulled the disc to start our game.

Since I’ve been playing with this group it’s been my observation that the extra person makes huge differences in games with 7-11 players. Not usually so much with anything more that that because often it gets so crowded that you can just kind of zone the other team when you’re down a player. But what is not supposed to happen is that the team short a player gets a lot of long scores because in theory the extra-player team can always have a “safety”.

Yesterday was the exception to that Ultimate axiom. The gold team, stacked with the legs of JQ, Bob, Hollan, & Will exploded for a run of early scores on deep passes. Despite the attempted force lessons of yesterday, our green team could still just not effect the defensive theory of “forcing middle” and gave up pass after pass down the sidelines.

We also gave up two toe dragging end zone sideline scores to ballerinas Rodney & Will. Kevin almost came down with one of his own for green but called himself out on the back line. Mercifully, Ultimate Karma provided for an immediate gold turnover after that and we got a nice short score but it was one of very too few for green yesterday.

Erik did manage to pull in a few scores yesterday for green but I would submit that at least two of those were on “missed” throws to other players that he just found himself in the right position for. I know this because the first one came out of my hands and was headed for JasonK whom I could just not find the range to yesterday missing him by about ½ arm’s length on at least 3 passes in the end zone.

Good to see some guys back out yesterday that have been missing some lately…Brian & Mark. Thunder keeps trying to quit us for a day or two of rest, then checks the temperature at game time and realizes the addiction is just too strong and winds up wandering out to the field.

Alec, a newer addition to the Buzzards, and I were talking on the way out to the pitch yesterday and he asked how late in the season we play. I told him we played all through the winter last year and he asked for clarification.

“So you move inside at some point?”

“No we stay out” I said. “It’s only really bad on those high 20’s, low 30’s days with icy drizzle.”

“You’d have to trudge through 3 feet of snow in the winter where I’m from.” Alec observed.

“Oh? Where did you come here from?”

“Maine”

Well welcome to D.C. Alex. I grew up in the Northern Virginia suburbs and have lived in this area parts of about 25 years of my life and I can only remember 2-3 snowstorms that ever dropped that much of the white stuff. I think you’ll find our winter games practically mild by Maine standards.

Of course after a great defensive block on a mark yesterday, Alec was glad it wasn’t winter yet. He took a mean shot of disc off his hand.

Today is picture day boys & girls. Remember to brush your hair and tuck your shirts in before you come out today and Hollan has hopefully brought his camera. Phil, I hope you brought a clean shirt. The one you’ve been wearing that reeks of weekend beer and goose droppings is wearing thin.

Missing the bus

Submitted by Bill

Well, by the time Swinny got out there and asked “What color should I put on?” it was already painfully evident that he needed to come to our side. The “school bus yellow” team was in desperate need of the extra man as we were, indeed, getting schooled.

So then, I’m thinking, “I’ve got Phil, Swinny & the extra person...this should absolutely swing the balance of power our way”. Unfortunately, Ultimate Karma had already set in apparently and with Phil mocking the SOTG score sheet, Jorge, Frank, Swinny & I were left to suffer the wrath of the disc gods, not to mention just some pretty good play on the other side of the field by Todd, Hollan, Rodney, & Wings (making his return after being gone a couple weeks).

Despite all the rain the evening before and earlier that morning, the field was in surprisingly good shape with hardly any standing water…well except for that one mud bog that MattP stepped in when pivoting for a throw. It distracted him so much that I came about a half second from getting a 10 count on him.

I found myself a half second or half foot shy in several other instances as well…going up for a jump disc against Todd, following Rodney across and enzone cut and watching his arms extend further than I’ve ever seen them before to catch a score, tossing my “machete” to Phil for a potential score gone bad, and whirling around on the final point of the game some 13 times before watching the disc land in Hollan’s hands for the final score.

At the suggestion of another faithful Buzzard, there has been some talk of offering up a couple monthly awards; most Outstanding Buzzard, and of course “Spirit of the Game” winner. The prizes are yet to be determined but we’ll start with May honorees. Please email me with your selections towards the end of next week. The “SOTG” award is self explanatory if you read the description on the upa.org website.

As far as criteria for the “MOB” award…I’m open for suggestions but it should, I suspect, be someone who has come out “regularly” (a majority of the games called), and who has demonstrated some Ultimate prowess, throwing efficiency, catching (layouts are a plus), and the underappreciated good defense. Perhaps when you nominate somebody you could just give me a couple bullets as to why you are.

Since we rarely keep score in any kind of official capacity and because my team pairing can be unfairly prohibitive to individual success at times, that should not necessarily be a factor in your nominations. Obviously, the MOB is going to make his/her teammates better but they still may not come out on top all the time. Also, to keep this as a morale booster (as if playing Ultimate everyday wasn’t enough), maybe we could stipulate that a player can not win the award more than once a quarter? I’m open for ideas. Shoot me an email if you have some thoughts.

Going to be a beautiful day for a game today…sunny, mid 60’s, don’t miss the chance to come out before the long weekend.

Peering out the window...

I feel like the little kid who wants to go out and ride his bike but he’s looking out the living room window…you know with your nose mashed up against it so your mom will be cleaning who knows what off of it later…and it’s doing nothing but raining.

I considered calling for a game anyway this morning since it was supposed to be relatively warm. But I got in this morning, hung over from a night in the classroom listening to 4 hours of discussion on Education philosophers, I just put down a big country breakfast, and I’m still suffering the after affects of almost getting skunked yesterday…plus none of the other Buzzards were clamoring via email for a game to be called…so “the better part of valor is discretion” or some such Shakespearean nonsense has won out today. But I will…already do actually…miss playing.

So, the story of the “almost skunk” you ask? Well, pairing up yesterday I thought I had broken up the teams equitably…Todd on one…Phil on the other…separated Bryan and Travis so they could run each other into the ground and then through myself, Bob, Justin, & Frank into a hat and just tossed out green & gold pinnies, with Frank & Bob joining Visor & Swinny on the green and the other 4 of us pulling on the gold. Looked “fairly even”…or so I thought.

First of all, it took about 10 minutes for either team to score. That may not be an exaggeration at all. There were seriously at least 3 or 4 possessions each up and down the field with nobody even sniffing the end zone. Finally green busted through with the first score. I bone headed the next pull and gave them the disc on the goal line for the next score and then…4 more unanswered scores for green. By my count it was 6-0…it could have been more…and we were literally 20-25 minutes into the game. I muttered something about wondering what a skunk was as we got ready to receive the next pull and unbeknownst to me, Swinny was asking his teammates on the other end if we had even scored yet….that’s when DK set it. You know Disc Karma….yea, don’t mess with that.

On the very next pull, we got all 4 guys to touch the disc, made some very sharp crossing passes and give and go’s and got right in for green’s first score. That was about as good as it got for us the rest of the game. We held our own I suppose and the defense on both sides seemed to be…uh, generally speaking…a little tighter yesterday. We tried the “Force Flick” on D against Swinny most of the game and he beat us for a couple flick scores and even tried out his Hammer. All in all, though there was some debate about this as we came off the field, it beat being in the cube.

Enjoy the day of rest. Get ready for tomorrow, I’m not sitting inside again.